I Think
by Cards
Summary: Musings... Musings about him... (Not slash. Magic/Bumlets)


I like sex, It's not that hard to say. I crave it. I just am like that. I think every one knows but ah well if you didn't, now you do I guess. 

It makes me many things, none of which I am. 

Puta

Whore

Poulet

Every language known in this god-forsaken city has a word for it, I've been called all of them. I know what they mean even if I've never heard the language before, its how they say it. The spite as they spit the word out, like its more disgusting then I am. And that cruel look in their face, like I have no feelings to care about, as if I am lower then the cobbles they walk on. 

The men I sleep with have worse reputations then mine some times, but they escape all the names and the shame of being spit on. For some reason the fact that they are men gives them leave to sleep with who ever they want and to ruin me for sleeping with them

I know more then many whores; there is no reason for any one to ever call me in for trial so no one fears telling me things. I know about the elite of New York society. The men who see me and fall in love, escaping their wives or other things, I know their secrets. There is nothing in this city I do not know. 

So why did I give it up?

Him. He is the only reason. I don't get sex as much but it doesn't matter. I know he loves me and that is more then anything I could ask for. More then I deserve, that much is sure. I do not expect him to stay with me, nor does he expect me to stay another night with him. 

He doesn't expect me to be his whore, or show me off to his friends like a new toy. I'm not another line in a string of conquests to him, and he isn't a way to get through the night to me. 

He stands up for me when I hear the words, quietly whispering about how I am beautiful and it doesn't matter what they say. I know it does and so does he but the lies make us feel better. 

I know that the other guys think badly of me. It doesn't matter to them that I slept with them, only that I wasn't at the moment; even then many of them would call me a whore as they kissed me. I just expected it; it doesn't take much to decide you're as low as they say.

I have never walked into the Lodging house alone, I always go in with some one. Normally it's to protect my self from the hurtful glares that are thrown at me. 

You wouldn't think we would judge each other. No one likes us any way, we should band together in our own groups. But I know that people have a need to have those below them, just to know that they are not the lowest humanity gets. And when those who were the lowest rise the only thing they do is put down their prior companions.

Looks are important in this world; looks can save your life. Appearance and how you use it can define who you are and how long you'll live. I'm not ashamed to say I am stunning. I know it. He tells me every day, and hundreds have told me in the morning as they kiss me how beautiful I am. But he means it. Tells me as I come in from the cold with one of the kids grabbing onto my hand and my cheeks are covered in newsprint and flushed with the cold. 

His kisses are sweet, like honey. Every one of them is a treat and I can never have too much. His hands will capture my face and gently pull me towards him, his lips will catch mine and I can get lost in the warmth he has, the sweetness of everything about him. No matter how many times we sleep together he treats me like a doll one that could be broken far too easily. Everything about him is soft; his lips, hair, smile, eyes, skin. Everything. 

He's so full of love, he loves me, loves his siblings. Even if he can't see them he tells me about them, and some times he sees the oldest ones on their way home from school, he says they look fine, but I know he's worried about them. He even loves each and every orphan that comes here, needing a big brother, or someone to tell him or her everything will be all right. 

I think I can do this. I think I can love him. I think I can give up sex for him forever. 

Disclaimer: I do Not Own Bumlets, I do own Magic and Bumlets siblings.

Author's Notes: As if you couldn't tell this is said by Magic and is about Her and Bumlets. (Go Bumletsmuse for inspiring me to actually write this! And for sticking by me in my study halls!)

Cards On:

Squid-

Our school has a champion Squid Catching Team! Really they were feature in "Extreme Squid Catching" (Stupid Drama thing… Just ignore us sex crazed)


End file.
